Dealing with Grief

I’m not always the strong person people think I am. There are times when I suddenly get depressed about the lost of our baby and the depression gets stronger when I see babies carried by their moms (mostly at the church we go to) or read blogs of new moms who are currently enjoying their newborns.

I have realized that dealing with grief is going to be lifetime for me. You know you’re in the process of overcoming it but somehow, it’s there to remind you of the loss every now and then. Even if you constantly assure yourself that you have lifted everything up to God, a lot of things and scenes around you would remind you of the loss. Even if you say you’ve recovered, somehow it’s still there.

I look forward to the day when I could no longer remember, but it seems only time could tell. I guess it’s gonna be forever. Okay. Maybe I’ll just look forward to the day when I could still remember but the remembering is more of joy instead of sadness, rejoicing instead of grief. Ah, what an unfathomable feeling to have lost someone you truly loved and cared, anticipated and prepared for! 🙁

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